Friday, April 1, 2011
GNAA acquires freenode
Leon Kaiser - London, England
London, England - In an attempt to rid itself of its tarnished public image after being linked to the shooting of Arizona congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords, the Peer-Directed Projects Center Ltd. (PDPC) decided to sell its only source of income: the freenode IRC network.
GNAA jumped on the opportunity, purchasing freenode for a mere seventeen dollars. The network was subsequently renamed to "feenode", a subscription-based IRC network for free software development.
"We had been pressuring the PDPC for years to sell us freenode." Commented GNAA member BarkingFish, "Does anyone else think Jews are really hot? Especially rabbis! Those greasy curls send me wild! Sadly, there's no Jews in my region of the desert..."
"I want to suck off little boys, make them bleed and make slushies out of their fluids," former freenode IRC operator kloeri moaned. "While an IRC operator, kloeri was allowed to run rampant on the network, cybering untold thousands of underage children. This will not be the case under GNAA ownership," responded GNAA representative Klerck.
"The fact that it was a free service really seemed to attract pedophiles," said GNAA spokesnigger Rucas, "we sought to change that, so we added a small fee: for only $19.99 a month, you can chat on the world's premier FOSS IRC network!"
"Our agenda is very simple," wrote pynchon, "after ridding the network of convicted sex offenders and other such vermin, we plan on turning to the Wikipedia IRC channels. The maturity in those channels is staggeringly childish, we simply can't have that on our IRC network. After we drain all of the money from their mother's credit cards, we plan on klining them one by one."
When asked to comment, GNAA founder Gary Niger merely quipped "our hope is that some day, children will feel safe chatting on feenode."
Founded by Rob Levin, a pioneer of the hand-to-mouth lifestyle, freenode quickly became the largest haven for sex crimes on the Internet. In 2006, after years of using PDPC funds to fund his deviant sexual lifestyle, Rob Levin underwent a miraculous transformation into both roadkill and a hood ornament.About feenode:
______ __ / \ / | /$$$$$$ |______ ______ _______ ______ ____$$ | ______ $$ |_ $$// \ / \ / \ / \ / $$ | / \ $$ | /$$$$$$ |/$$$$$$ |$$$$$$$ |/$$$$$$ |/$$$$$$$ |/$$$$$$ | $$$$/ $$ $$ |$$ $$ |$$ | $$ |$$ | $$ |$$ | $$ |$$ $$ | $$ | $$$$$$$$/ $$$$$$$$/ $$ | $$ |$$ \__$$ |$$ \__$$ |$$$$$$$$/ $$ | $$ |$$ |$$ | $$ |$$ $$/ $$ $$ |$$ | $$/ $$$$$$$/ $$$$$$$/ $$/ $$/ $$$$$$/ $$$$$$$/ $$$$$$$/About GNAA:
GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) is the first organization which gathers GAY NIGGERS from all over America and abroad for one common goal - being GAY NIGGERS.
Are you GAY?
Are you a NIGGER?
Are you a GAY NIGGER?
If you answered "Yes" to all of the above questions, then GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) might be exactly what you've been looking for!
Join GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) today, and enjoy all the benefits of being a full-time GNAA member.
GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) is the fastest-growing GAY NIGGER community with THOUSANDS of members all over United States of America and the World! You, too, can be a part of GNAA if you join today!
Why not? It's quick and easy - only 3 simple steps!
- First, you have to obtain a copy of GAYNIGGERS FROM OUTER SPACE THE MOVIE and watch it. You can download the movie (~130mb) using BitTorrent.
- Second, you need to succeed in posting a GNAA First Post on slashdot.org, a popular "news for trolls" website.
- Third, you need to join the official GNAA irc channel #GNAA on irc.gnaa.eu, and apply for membership.
If you are having trouble locating #GNAA, the official GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA irc channel, you might be on a wrong irc network. The correct network is NiggerNET, and you can connect to irc.gnaa.eu as our official server. Follow this link if you are using an irc client such as mIRC.
If you have mod points and would like to support GNAA, please moderate this post up.
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